Last year many people told me how much they liked my winter solstice cards, but not many people bought them, in part I think because I got the store up too late in the season. I will not make the same mistake this year! The winter cards aren't back up yet, but soon they will be. And what better way to say "Well, we've got the day off work" than to send a card wishing you and yours a very happy Chinese Food Day?
My mother is not Jewish (she is Protestant) and though she is not religious either she does have lingering sentiments relating to Christmas Day, and the presents, and the tree that she will never again have because my father made his proposal of marriage contingent on her agreement that there would never be a Christmas tree in their home -- and she likes to see me on Christmas Day. And my father likes to see me regardless, and we all like Chinese food, so it works out.
I am not kidding about that Christmas tree thing, by the way. My father is almost as bad as I am. Fortunately neither of us is as bad as Walter Freeman, who made his wife promise in writing, on their wedding night, that she wouldn't try to raise their kids Catholic. They had had to get special dispensation from the cardinal in order to marry, and having sat through a lecture from a priest on his duty to his future wife, Walter was ready to wash his hands of Catholicism for good. (Eventually they split the difference and had the first and fourth kids baptized as Catholics, and the twins as Episcopalians. I don't know about the last two; maybe Walter and Marjorie were both fed up by then and didn't bother one way or the other. I'll add that to the list of questions for Doctor Three. I mean Walter.) It's actually kind of hilarious to imagine Walter Freeman being lectured by a priest.