The Sorrows of Young Werewolf (eyeteeth) wrote,
The Sorrows of Young Werewolf

Don't TSA me, bro!

Full disclosure part one: I didn't actually get groped when I took a flight out of JFK. I drew this comic in advance because my sister doesn't like to let me use her Officejet all-in-one printer to scan stuff. (She is convinced that once when I did this I screwed up her software somehow; I still say she is mistaken.) So I set this up before leaving. With dry mouth and pounding heart I waited in line to make my stand, fully anticipating hostility followed by groping, only to find the porno-scanner roped off and unused. So I just went through the metal detector like usual and then paid a billion dollars for coffee like usual.

Full disclosure part two: I didn't think of the phrase "the audacity of grope" myself, but it's unlikely the person I got it from did either, as there are about eighteen thousand hits for the phrase on Google.

Full disclosure part three: Yes, what you see is an unabashed reference to my sex organs. Technically it should be vulva and not vagina, but I think that would have dulled the impact of the sentiment. Anyway, yes, I'm a woman. It's not like that was a big secret, but this is the first time either in my comics or on this blog that I have made that explicit. (What, I could have been a gay man fantasizing about getting a backrub from Zeppo Marx.) It just seems to me that if the TSA is going to try to sell its new tactics with rape logic -- no one else minds what we're doing, stop being such an uptight bitch, what did you expect when you came here, you're only making this harder on yourself by fighting it -- then I should point out that I'm an old hand at rape logic, because I'm a woman, and "What do I do if a stranger tries to touch my genitals?" isn't exactly a new question for me.

I might as well mention here that I can pull rank, as it were, in another way: I am a New Yorker, and I was here when the World Trade Center was attacked. I inhaled the people who were killed in that attack. And I have never been as afraid of terrorists as I was of what might happen to me at that airport security checkpoint. Because terrorists can kill me, sure, I'm not suggesting they couldn't, but so could a lot of things, and terrorists can't do what the TSA wants to do: institutionalize a casual disregard for my right to determine who looks at and touches my body. That's in the Constitution, guys! I checked!
Tags: stix, tinyfists, zeppo marx
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