The Sorrows of Young Werewolf (eyeteeth) wrote,
The Sorrows of Young Werewolf

The Outsider Jew gets a cold

Maybe I shouldn't have tried to make a statement here. Probably I should just have said "If you see something, say something to Don Quixote -- he's a friendly guy" with a picture of him waving. It's funny how ideas change between the time when you think of them and the time when they're done. And then they keep changing, they firm up like a gelatin dessert, so they're not the same the week afterward. With writing you can keep hacking at them until you're satisfied, but that's harder with drawings.

Anyway, I did once see a bunch of cops on a subway platform converging on a child's backpack, presumably because someone saw something and said something. ("If you see something, say something" is the English version of this motto, and it's plastered all over the subway now.) That got me to thinking about what would have happened if it had been a bomb, because these were all just regular cops, of course -- you're not going to call out a bomb squad every time a kid leaves a Dora the Explorer backpack on a train platform. If it had been a bomb, rather than harming potentially no one, it would have injured or killed a whole bunch of cops, in addition to anyone else who happened to be nearby, because of course the platform hadn't been cleared. No one feels safer because of this campaign, right? No one thinks it does any good? I mean, you can't, if you think about it for any length of time at all. I'm not a conspiracy theorist, I don't think the point of this kind of thing is to keep everyone in a constant state of anxiety so we don't question the Illuminati, it's just that it's dumb and is predicated on the idea that I'm also dumb, and that kind of thing makes me angry. Also, it encourages New Yorkers to spy on each other. Also, it wastes resources. Dumb, invasive, and wasteful -- the trifecta of post-9/11 security theater. Pardon me, tetrafecta, as I don't doubt that it's also racist as hell. Probably 90 percent of the calls are something like "I saw a brown guy with a briefcase."

This one's happier:

A 100 percent true occurrence from Yom Kippur services in my neighborhood. Sadly, the fast may have helped along this upper respiratory infection I'm just getting over. Security theater is dumb and so are tonsils! I'd love to get rid of mine but everyone says that getting them removed in adulthood is more painful than childbirth without drugs, etc. Maybe I can do the newfangled thing where you get them shaved down with lasers. That sounds metal. Anyway GOOD THING MY COUGH IS PRODUCTIVE BECAUSE I'M SURE NOT LOL
Tags: don quixote, every new yorker's god-given right, incompetent design, judaism, repulsivepersonaldetails, someone should give me a backrub, stix
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